Foster Your Voice

Helping trial attorneys deliver a message that inspires action.

FYV #60 - Stop Sounding Like "Baby Shark" in Your Trial Advocacy

melody neural pathways Mar 09, 2026

In this episode, Kristi dives into the neuroscience behind growth, skill-building, and why your brain resists change—especially when you’re developing new communication strategies in the courtroom. She explains how neural pathways are formed, why you can’t simply “delete” old habits, and how focusing on what you want to eliminate may actually reinforce the very patterns you’re trying to break.

Using practical reframes and a memorable tattoo analogy, she challenges you to shift your focus from stopping unwanted behaviors to intentionally building new ones. The communication tip brings the concept full circle with a powerful courtroom strategy: resetting the melody. Through musical examples, Kristi illustrates how vocal variation and structural contrast keep jurors neurologically engaged—and why monotone delivery is the fastest way to lose attention.

LISTEN HERE...

In this episode, you’ll learn:

What neural pathways are and how they strengthen with repetition
Why the brain works through reinforcement—not elimination
How attention activates the very circuitry you’re focusing on
Why obsessing over “breaking” a habit can make it stronger
Practical reframes to build new communication patterns in the courtroom
How vocal variation resets juror attention
The difference between structured contrast and monotonous repetition
Simple ways to signal transitions using pitch, pause, and tempo

Key Takeaway:

The brain builds what it practices. If you want new results in your courtroom communication, stop fixating on what you’re trying to eliminate and start reinforcing what you want to create—both mentally and vocally.

Favorite Moment:

The tattoo analogy—where the old design isn’t removed, just overshadowed by something stronger and more intentional. A perfect metaphor for how new neural pathways become dominant.

Links & Resources:

@ReclaimingMelissa New neural pathways https://www.facebook.com/share/v/1CBmHavFsT/?mibextid=wwXIfr

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If this episode sparked a reframe for you, share it with a colleague preparing for trial. And if you come up with your own courtroom communication reframes, send them my way—I’d love to feature them in a future episode.

Until next time, keep fostering your voice.

TRANSCRIPT:

Helllooooo!! Hello Foster Fam! Welcome back, I'm Kristi Foster, your host.

On this podcast, I end up focusing a good percentage of the point of interest segments around goal setting and mindset when it comes to skill building. "But, this is supposed to be a voice podcast, Kristi, right?" Yes...yes it is. But, here's how I see it...for the clients I work with, they are choosing to explore something that is outside of their normal communication tactics or style. And as soon as we start messing with the status quo, the brain chimes in with a "Oh, no no no! That's not what we want."

So, when you commit to developing your voice and your entire nonverbal communication package for more strategic and transformative courtroom connections, your brain freaks out. That's just how brains work. At a baseline level, the brain prioritizes efficiency and survival. It’s wired to seek reward, avoid threat, and conserve energy.

SO...yes, this IS a voice and nonverbal focused podcast, but we just HAVE to address mindset and start to work WITH the brain. We have to figure out why and how it rebels. How it tries to keep you far away from challenge and growth. And, you know what...I'm right there in the trenches with you.

I'm not trying to improve MY personal communication with jurors, but I AM trying to address my mindset as I navigate aging, health & wellness, working out, managing anxiety, etc. I'm a learner by nature, but that comes with a lot of mental obstacles. It helps me to talk through all this neuroscience stuff and I hope it helps you too. The goal here is to learn to work with our brain to help it create new neural pathways.

What ARE neural pathways? A clean definition is this: A repeated, structured route of electrical and chemical signaling between neurons that produces a predictable output — movement, thought, emotion, or behavior. It’s wiring that strengthens with repetition. It’s electrochemical communication. Signals move electrically within a neuron, chemically across synapses, and then electrically again down the next neuron.

The more a pathway is used, the stronger it becomes. Repetitive activation increases synaptic efficiency, making signals travel more smoothly and with less effort. We're always chasing faster signal speed.

Now, what's important to remember is that we're talking about building NEW neural pathways as we break patterns and learn new skills. We're NOT talking about deleting OLD neural pathways. That's not how it works. You can't delete them. We CAN, however, create new behaviors, repeat the patterns and then make those stronger than the old ones so the old ones kind of fade away.

Where we struggle though, or I guess I'll just say where I struggle is that I sometimes spend too long thinking about the pattern I want to break. "Well sure. You have to know what the habits that are bad and strategize ways to break them, right?" Actually, no. If your attention stays fixed on the unwanted pattern, you may unintentionally reinforce it — because attention activates the circuitry that you’re trying to weaken. When you keep your focus on how to break a pattern, you end up strengthening it instead. You're making those neurons fire which just reinforce the pattern.

There's a gal on Instagram, her channel is Reclaiming Melissa and I'll post the link to her in the show notes, and she is a specialized somatic trauma therapist that talks all about how the brain works for new growth. In a recent reel I saw, which, again, I'll post in the show notes, she reminded us that, "The brain does not work by elimination, it works by reinforcement."

She gave a popular example of "don't think of a pink elephant." So, of COURSE you think of a pink elephant. The brain doesn't work in negatives. It will think of the very thing you want to avoid. And it does that with behaviors, as well as thought patterns.

She goes on to say, "Attention is activation." When you continue to obsessively think about what you want to eliminate, you are firing the neurons that are keeping you connected to that behavior. "What fires together, wires together." I thought that was a helpful soundtrack.

SO...Focus on what you want to build instead.

Instead of "how do i get myself to not shut down?" Ask "What would feeling present look like?"

Instead of "how do I quit people pleasing?" Ask "how do i honor my own needs?"

Let me give you some reframes that specifically relate to courtroom communication:

Instead of, “How do I sound more powerful?” ask “How do I want the jury to feel when I speak?”

Instead of, “How do I stop my voice from shaking?” ask, “What would steady feel like in my body?”

Instead of, “How do I make sure they understand everything?” ask, “What is the one idea they must not miss?”

Instead of, “How do I not get too emotional?” ask, “How can I channel emotion in a way that serves clarity?”

Instead of, “How do I not get thrown off by them?” ask, “What anchors me back to my message?”

I'd love to hear some reframes that you come up with too. Send me an email or find me on the socials and DM me. When we can ask the right questions, the old pathways weaken from lack of use, and the new ones get stronger with practice.

It kind of reminds me of my cousin Megan who, now as a 40-something adult realized that she didn't really like the tattoo she got in her early 20s. It just didn't represent her well and she didn't connect with it anymore. Instead of having it removed, instead she built a new tattoo design around the one she had outgrown. It wasn't deleted. The new design became dominant. The old one was still there, but its clarity had diminished to the point where, you can't even see it anymore because the new design is so vibrant and striking.

As you're moving towards a new mindset, towards setting goals, towards wanting to grow in your trial advocacy and communication strategies, Melissa says to "Shift your focus from what you hate to what you want to build." The brain builds what it practices.

—BREAK—

Here's something that you can start doing right away in all your legal communication. If you're starting a trial this week, or even if you're doing depositions this week, or maybe a focus group, do this communication shift to keep your audience neurologically engaged.

Here it is...reset the melody.

Okay, let's do a little music lesson here. Think of a song. Really, nearly every song does this. They're written in some kind of FORM. They have natural sections to them. Maybe they start with a verse. Then they go to the chorus. Then AFTER the chorus, they probably return to do another verse. And then a chorus, a bridge and then a final chorus with an ending tagged on.

Let's take an easy song like "Shake It Off" by Taylor Swift. Any Swifties listening? I came late to the Swifty party, but I'm solidly there now I think. So, it starts with a verse "I stay out too late, got nothing in my brain, that's what people say mmm-hmm...". Then we get to a pre-chorus "But I keep cruising. Can't stop, won't stop movin'..." and then finally we get to the chorus "Cause the players gonna play play play play play, and the haters gonna hate hate hate hate hate...' etc. SO, verse, pre-chorus, chorus.

Now, stick with me...what happens next? "I never miss a beat. I'm lightning on my feet. And that's what they don't see, mmm hmm..." Have we heard that melody before? Sure we did. That's the verse. After the verse, we're going to the a pre-chorus and then "Cause the players gonna play play play play play, and the haters gonna hate hate hate hate hate...' we're back to the chorus.

For this song, then there's a bridge and then it returns to a final chorus and the song ends. Boom! That's the form of the song.

You still with me?

Okay, now think of the song "Baby Shark." (singing) "Baby shark doot doo doo doot doo doo...Mommy shark...Daddy shark..." There is just NOTHING to that song. There’s no structural variation — it’s repetition without contrast. It's the same thing over and over and over again, ad nauseam.

I'm getting to my point here. If these two songs were opening statements in court, which do you think would garner more engagement long term? Which would hold interest? Which would keep ears tantalized and listeners active, and which would make them zone out and go on auto-pilot?

Jurors are going to thrive under a Taylor Swift approach because variation resets attention., and they're going to zone out if you take a Baby Shark approach.

Reset the melody. Treat each new section of your opening as a fresh song. Signal the transition vocally. Are you doing the verse, the chorus, or the bridge? Or, are you accidentally caught in an endless loop where everything sounds the same, there's no variation, and your dense information and long explanations are just getting lost?

Start thinking about how you vocally move to the next key point. Change the tune. Reset the melody. Briefly add pitch variations to refresh and reengage attention. Use pitch shifts, intentional pauses, and slight tempo changes to signal a new section.