Breath is more than survival—it’s leadership. In this episode, Kristi pulls back the curtain on how trial attorneys can use breath not just for vocal power, but for nervous system regulation and courtroom leadership. From gospel singing roots to practical techniques like box and triangle breathing, you’ll learn how intentional breath control can steady your system, shape juror perception, and give you the stamina to lead with authority in high-stakes moments.

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In this episode, you’ll learn:

1. Why courtroom breath needs to be more like a singer’s breath.

2. How your autonomic nervous system responds instantly to how you breathe.

3. The difference between fight-or-flight and rest-and-digest states—and how breath shifts you between them.

4. Why box breathing and triangle breathing are powerful tools for managing nerves.

5. How your breathing patterns unconsciously influence jurors’ emotional state.

6. Practical ways to integrate intentional breathwork into trial prep and live courtroom delivery.

Key Takeaway:

Breath isn’t just automatic—it’s strategic. The way you breathe sustains your voice, regulates your nervous system, and shapes the energy in the courtroom.

Favorite Moment:

“Breath isn’t just SELF-regulation. It’s leadership. Jurors unconsciously borrow the rhythm of your breath. When you’re grounded and breathing low and slow, you model calm—and they follow you there.”

Links & Resources:

TED Talk https://www.ted.com/dubbing/manoush_zomorodi_how_boredom_can_lead_to_your_most_brilliant_ideas/transcript?audio=en&language=en

Top 20 Legal Terms to Avoid: https://www.fostervoicestudio.com/top20

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TRANSCRIPT:

Helllooooo! Hello Foster Fam. Today we're going to talk about how to manage your nerves and you'll walk away with some practical, try-it-right-now skills. I love when we can try things in real time and get some immediate results. So much of learning doesn't work like that. You have to put in the reps, practice in low-stakes situations, create mental safety for the new skill, build new neural pathways and develop muscle memory. But...today we're doing some breathwork which can provide some IMMEDIATE resets for you.

Before we dive in though, I had to just share with you this TED talk I watched recently. I'm not sure how I came across it because it's from April 2017. But...oh boy! I felt seen, and called out. hahah! So, now I get to share it with you so we can be convicted together. See how that works? Lucky you. haha!

But seriously, let me start by just sharing vulnerably with you that I have this laziness complex. I don't know if that's the technical name, but I have this self-judgement that runs deep that tells me I'm lazy, unmotivated. Sometimes it's not until the end of the year when i do a recap that i can see all I accomplished and remember that i wasn't actually lazy.

But because of this complex, I have a hard time relaxing. I have a hard time just embracing boredom. While I watch TV at night, I ALSO plan social media content and edit scripts. Or maybe i don't do work-work, but I look up actors on wikipedia & read about their lives. Or, I color, or I just mindlessly scroll on my phone.

The point is, I'm not good at being bored and single-tasking. In fact, I actually just realized that I have used the soundtrack "better busy than bored" for YEARS. Like, when catching up with someone, the convo goes:

Me: "Hey! How's it going?"

Them: "Oh you know, just busy."

Me: "Yep! Me too, but better busy than bored, right?"

So, this TED talk kind of hit me. Manoush Zomorodi, a journalist and host of "TED radio hour" on NPR delivered the blow.

She says, "It turns out that when you get bored, you ignite a network in your brain called the "default mode." So our body, it goes on autopilot while we're folding the laundry or we're walking to work, but actually that is when our brain gets really busy."

She goes on to say that "default mode is when we connect disparate ideas, we solve some of our most nagging problems, and we do something called "autobiographical planning." This is when we look back at our lives, we take note of the big moments, we create a personal narrative, and then we set goals and we figure out what steps we need to take to reach them."

By multi-tasking and keeping busy, we are robbing our brain of creative resources and actually, we're not truly multi-tasking anyway. That's just not how the brain works. It shifting from task to task, rapidly, but it's not doing multiple things at once. And each shift is depleted neural resources.

(sigh) Can you see why i was convicted? Are you feeling it too?

I'll put the link to her full TED talk in the show notes and I highly recommend you check it out. It certainly gave me pause, literally, and I'm trying to find a new comfort with single-tasking and with boredom.

—BREAK—

Now, If you’ve been listening for a while, you know I often talk about breath. Breath support, breath regulation, breath as part of your communication strategy. And today, I want to take you a little deeper into how your breath is not just about staying alive—it really is about leading the room.

I want to start with a confession: I am a good breather.

Now, I know what you’re thinking—Kristi, we all breathe. We do it all day, every day. True. But I’m telling you—I’m better than most. Every time I go to the doctor and they listen to my breath through their stethoscope, I just KNOW they are impressed. Not to toot my own horn but… TOOT TOOT!

So, where does this come from? Well, from the time I was five years old, my whole life was oriented toward becoming a professional singer. My dad was a gospel singer, I wanted to be just like him, and I trained for years. I remember, oh gosh, I was probably 10 or 11, standing in his office and he was teaching me how to breathe for singing. Abdominal breathing.

And here’s the thing—breathing for singing is different than breathing for conversational speaking. Because in singing, you need breath that sustains. You need the kind of control that lets you hit higher notes, shape phrases, and create dynamics—changing volume and tone to match emotion.

But here’s the key for you, trial attorneys:

Those same qualities—stamina, vocal variety, dynamic control—are just as critical in the courtroom as they are on stage. And they all start with breath.

So, while casual conversational speaking can get away with higher, more shallow breathing, courtroom communication, and courtroom leadership, requires a breath practice that's more like a singer's.

Breath Is More Than Automatic

Here’s something I didn’t fully realize until a few years ago: breath isn’t just about keeping us alive or powering sound. I knew that already. But, it’s also directly connected to our nervous system and immediately impacts your nervous system.

Your autonomic nervous system runs all those automatic body functions you don’t have to think about: your heartbeat, digestion, blinking, kidney function. And thank goodness, right? Nobody wants to sit around reminding their stomach to digest lunch or their heart to keep beating.

But breathing is unique. It’s the one function that’s both automatic and under your voluntary control. You can let it run on autopilot, and you do. This is that all day long, every day functionality. BUT you can also step in and consciously change it. You can hold your breath. You can pant. You can slow it way down.

And when you do, you actually send signals to your nervous system—signals that either rev you up or calm you down.

This is why breath is such a powerful lever for trial attorneys. When nerves are high, when stress is spiking, when adrenaline is flooding your system, your breathing can either fuel the fire—or reset the whole system.

Fight-or-Flight vs. Rest-and-Digest

Here’s a quick science check.

Your autonomic nervous system has two branches:

1. Sympathetic: This is your fight-or-flight mode. It’s what gets activated when you’re stressed, anxious, or under threat. It’s also what helps you focus and get moving when you need to. But if it runs too hot for too long, you get jittery, breathless, or mentally scattered.

2. Parasympathetic: This is your rest-and-digest mode. It slows the heart rate, lowers blood pressure, and creates a sense of calm focus. This is where clear thinking, steady speaking, and thoughtful decision-making live.

The beautiful part? Breath can help you shift from one to the other.

Breathing Techniques in High Stakes Situations

Several years ago, the concept of box breathing became popular. Navy SEALs use it to regulate stress in combat situations. If it works under that kind of pressure, it can certainly work for trial.

Here’s how it goes:

1. Inhale for four counts.

2. Hold for four counts.

3. Exhale for four counts.

4. Hold again for four counts.

   And then repeat.

That rhythm creates balance. It steadies the nervous system and helps downshift from sympathetic “fight-or-flight” into parasympathetic “rest-and-digest.”

But here’s the thing—not every breathing technique works for everyone. For me, the hold at the bottom of the exhale—the moment when the lungs are empty—actually spikes a stress response. It feels like being underwater too long. Instead of calming me, it revs me back up.

So I use triangle breathing instead. It’s the same pattern, minus that last hold:

1. Inhale for four counts.

2. Hold for four counts.

3. Exhale for four counts.

   Then right back into the inhale.

It’s simpler, smoother, and keeps me in that parasympathetic zone without triggering panic.

So the point is—experiment. Try box breathing. Try triangle breathing. See which one lets you feel most steady and clear.

Why This Matters in Trial

So, what does this matter in the courtroom?

If your breath is shallow, high in the chest, you’re signaling stress—not just to your own body, but to your jury. Remember, breath is contagious. People unconsciously mirror each other. If you’re tight and high-breathing, your jurors may feel that same anxiousness.

But if you’re breathing low and slow, visibly grounded, you model calm. Jurors unconsciously borrow that rhythm from you. And when they’re calmer, they can think more clearly, process more deeply, and make better decisions.

That’s the win.

So, breath isn’t just SELF-regulation. It’s leadership.

Practical Application for Attorneys

Here’s how you can put this into practice:

1. Before speaking: Use two or three rounds of box or triangle breathing. It only takes a minute, and it primes your nervous system to be steady. So, either find a private place or intentionally disassociate and focus on your breathing.

2. During trial prep: Integrate mindful breathing into your run-throughs. Don’t just practice your words—practice how you breathe with them. Plan your pauses. Plan your reset moments. And practice them.

3. In the courtroom: When you feel your voice tightening or nerves rising, reset with one intentional breath. Low, slow, expansive. Your body and your jurors will thank you.

4. Outside of court: The more you practice in low-stakes settings—at your desk, in the car, even in line at the store—the more your nervous system learns to default to calm under pressure.

Wrap-Up

So here’s your takeaway:

Breath isn’t just automatic. It’s strategic.

It sustains your voice.

It regulates your nervous system.

And it shapes the energy in the courtroom—for you and for your jury.

Try box breathing. Try triangle breathing. Build awareness of how you breathe and what it signals.

Because when you control your breath—you control the room.

Now, as always, if this episode resonated, I’d love for you to share it with a colleague, or leave a quick review. It helps other attorneys find the show and rethink the way they use their voices in trial.

Until next time—keep breathing with intention, and keep fostering your voice.