Ever been in the middle of a crucial point in court—or even at home—when suddenly your voice betrays you? Instead of authority, your pitch climbs higher and higher until you sound anxious, unstable, or even cartoonish. This episode breaks down why it happens and, more importantly, how to fix it. You’ll learn the three-step process to ground your body, breath, and voice so you can speak with calm authority, even when emotions are intense.

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In this episode, you'll learn:

1. Why your pitch rises under stress (and the neuroscience behind it).

2. The three steps to grounding: body, breath, and voice.

3. How jurors unconsciously mirror your nervous system—and why that matters for credibility.

4. Practical ways to practice grounding in low-stakes situations so it’s automatic in court.

5. How to express passion and urgency without sounding shrill or strained.

Key Takeaway

When your pitch climbs, jurors don’t just hear anxiety—they feel it. Grounding your body, breath, and voice allows you to project calm authority and earn jurors’ trust, even in high-stakes moments.

Favorite moment

“When your pitch keeps climbing and your voice sounds tight, jurors unconsciously register that as anxiety. If you’re nervous, they feel nervous. But when you ground your voice—through posture, breath, and connection—you project calm authority. Jurors think, ‘This attorney is confident. I can trust them to guide me.’”

Links & Resources

1. 🎙️ FYV #36 - How Your Breathing Shapes Jury Decision-Making https://www.fostervoicestudio.com/blog/36

2. $7 Mini Training SPEAK SO THEY GET IT: https://www.fostervoicestudio.com/speak

3. Free Resource THE TOP 20 LEGAL TERMS TO AVOID: https://www.fostervoicestudio.com/top20

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TRANSCRIPT:

Hellooooo!!! Hello Foster Fam! Welcome back to another episode of the Foster Your Voice Podcast. I'm your host, Kristi Foster and I'm delighted that you're listening.

IF you're so inclined, please do leave a 5-star rating on your podcast app, and if you're listening on Apple Podcasts, please consider leaving a quick written review as well. I really can't express enough what an encouragement it is to me to know that I'm not speaking into a void and that something I'm sharing is landing and having a positive impact.

Before we dig into today's topic, I want to remind you that I have a new $7 mini-training all about how to Speak So They Get It — walking you through a step-by-step, 3-part framework to get your actual language to a place where jurors can understand you, follow along, stay engaged, and ultimately be able to to advocate for your client when you're not in the room with them.

I just know, for me, I am exceedingly rule oriented. I actually find weird joy in knowing that I've followed the rules. Hahah!! THat's maybe some strange insight into who I am as a person. ha!

I think about when I'm learning to play a new game with friends, I'm the one reaching for the instruction booklet. I"m the one reading the rules. And, even if someone else has played the game before, somehow, I tend to become the leader. When there's a question of whether a rule is being followed, they look to me, and I rely on the instructions that I read.

So, I can't stress enough just how important it is that you give exceedingly clear information to the jury both in your case presentation, and also in your jury instructions.

SOMEONE in the jury room will be looked to for leadership, to answer group questions, and to refer back to instructions and rules. So, make sure that you are equipping them with the language you want so they are well equipped, can feel thankful for all that you provided for them, and are able to follow the rules for the sake of your client.

Unlike real life, there is no practice round. So make sure you are clear. Don't frustrate your jury by expecting their success without equipping them for it.

So, go ahead and pick up my Speak So They Get It mini-training. It comes with an instructional video, a 12-page workbook to help you put pen to paper and do the practical work of translating from legalese to plain-speak, plus 3 great bonuses!

Go to fostervoicestudio.com/speak or click the link in the show notes. Let's get your message clear so your jury can be successful.

—BREAK—

Today we’re talking about a moment I know you’ve experienced—whether in the courtroom with a jury or at home in a heated conversation with your spouse. You’re emotionally invested. You care about what you’re saying. Maybe you’re building to an important point. You want gravitas. You want presence.

And then… your voice betrays you.

Instead of landing with depth and authority, suddenly your pitch climbs higher and higher until you sound less like a trusted guide and more like you’re auditioning for Mickey or Minnie Mouse.

Why does this happen?

It’s not that your voice doesn’t care. It’s that your nervous system is taking over. When you’re stressed or emotionally charged, your body goes into a mild version of fight-or-flight. Muscles around the larynx tighten. Breathing becomes shallow. And the pitch of your voice naturally rises. You don’t even notice it happening until it’s too late.

But here’s the good news: this is not permanent, and it’s not inevitable. There’s a fix. You can ground your voice.

What Does It Mean to Ground Your Voice?

When we talk about grounding, we’re talking about anchoring your sound. Creating stability in your body, breath, and imagination so your voice doesn’t spiral upward with your nerves.

Think of grounding like roots.

Step One: Ground the Body

Start with your posture. Imagine your feet sinking down into the ground. Not heavy or collapsed, but tall and expansive—like you’re being stretched both downward through your legs and upward through the crown of your head.

Relax your shoulders. Unlock your knees. Let your body feel steady but not stiff.

This tall, grounded posture communicates authority before you even open your mouth. And internally, it gives your nervous system the signal: “We’re safe. We’re steady. We’re not about to run away.”

Step Two: Ground the Breath

Here’s where the science comes in. When you get nervous, you tend to breathe high—up in the chest. That shallow breathing not only limits the air available for speaking, but it also activates the sympathetic nervous system: fight-or-flight. Be sure to listen to Episode 36 where I talk more about this breath-nervous system connection.

Instead of that high breath, you want low breathing—initiating from your diaphragm and abdominal muscles. Take a deep inhale, expanding your belly, while keeping your chest relatively still. This deeper breath helps stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system: rest-and-digest. In other words, calm.

Now, don’t stop at taking the breath. This is where a lot of people go wrong. They take a good, deep inhale—and then hold it. They grip it. And then they try to push sound out from the throat alone. That creates strain. Can you hear it in my voice? I'm gonna take a nice low deep breath, but now i'm essentially holding my breath and I have to push and strain. This is how you lose you grounding.

So, instead, you’ve got to use the air. Try this: hold the back of your hand in front of your mouth. Start speaking. Can you feel the air hitting your hand as you talk? That’s breath in action. That’s what supports your voice.

Step Three: Hook the Voice to the Breath

This is where grounding really comes alive.

Let the voice ride on the breath, not fight against it. You can even practice being a little extra breathy at first—just to exaggerate the sensation of airflow. That way, you train your body to connect sound and breath instead of letting tension cut it off.

Once you’ve got that connection, you’ll notice a huge shift. Your voice feels steadier. Fuller. More controlled.

And here’s the real payoff: you can express passion, urgency, even indignation—without sounding shrill or strained. You can get fired up without losing control.

Why This Matters in Court

It's so important to remember: Jurors aren’t just listening to your words. They’re taking in the sound of your voice as data about whether to trust you.

When your pitch keeps climbing and your voice sounds tight, jurors unconsciously register that as anxiety. If you’re nervous, they feel nervous. If your voice sounds unstable, your credibility feels unstable.

But when you ground your voice—through posture, breath, and connection—you project calm authority. Even in the middle of heated emotion, your sound communicates steadiness. Jurors think, “This attorney is confident. I can trust them to guide me.”

And there’s neuroscience to back this up. You know, I love me some brain science.

When you breathe low and slow, you’re not just calming yourself—you’re signaling calm to others. Humans mirror each other. If your breath is steady, your jurors’ nervous systems begin to steady, too. That’s when they’re in the best headspace for listening, learning, and making decisions.

Practice Grounding Before You Need It

Like every skill, grounding doesn’t happen automatically just because you know about it. You’ve got to practice in low-stakes situations so it’s available in high-stakes ones.

Try this:

1. Before a meeting or phone call, take 60 seconds to ground your posture, breathe low, and speak a few sentences while feeling the air on your hand.

2. In casual conversations, notice when your pitch starts to rise. Pause. Breathe low. Let your voice reset. The goal isn't to avoid higher pitch. Jurors LOVE hearing middle voice and sometimes head voice mixed into your presentation. But you need to do it ON PURPOSE, and not as part of your nervous response.

3. Practice connecting breath and voice with something as simple as reading aloud—keeping the sound riding on the airflow. You should be able to do this with your chest voice, your middle voice, and your head voice so that your entire range is grounded.

The more you practice, the more natural it becomes. And when the high-stakes moment comes—whether it’s cross-examining a witness or having a hard conversation at home—you’ll be ready.

Closing

So the next time you feel your voice creeping upward—when the moment is serious, when the emotion is high—don’t panic.

Pause.

Ground your body.

Ground your breath.

And let your voice hook into that foundation.

That’s how you speak with gravitas. That’s how you keep control of your sound. And that’s how you make sure jurors—or anyone else listening—hear not just your words, but your steady, confident presence behind them.

If today’s episode gave you something practical to try, would you share it with a colleague? And don’t forget to leave a quick review—it helps other trial attorneys find the show.

Until next time… keep fostering your voice.