Let Your Authentic Self Sound Instead of Trying to Sound Authentic

The Most Unique Voice in the World

One of my favorite parts of this work—truly one of the greatest privileges—is hearing what I call the most unique voice in the world every single time I meet someone new.

In my Vocal Snapshot Sessions (which, by the way, you should try saying five times fast—it’s impossible), I get to listen to, analyze, and interpret the voices of people from all over the country.

And every single time, I’m reminded:

No one else in the world has a voice like yours.

Your voice is cellular. It’s literally made of muscle fibers and cells that belong only to you.

That’s extraordinary.

So when someone sits across from me and I ask my first question—

“Do you like your voice?”—

I’m always a little surprised by what happens next.

Most people pause… sigh a little… and say,

“Not really.”

Or sometimes, a flat-out, “No.”

And it breaks my heart a little every time.

 

The Foundational Voice

Before we ever talk about tone, breath, pitch, or volume—we have to talk about relationship.

Specifically, the relationship you have with your own voice.

Here’s what I always remind my clients: you already have people in your life who love your voice.

You have children who are comforted by it.

A partner who softens when they hear it.

Friends who can pick your voice out of a crowded room and instantly smile.

Your voice, as it is right now, has carried you through every conversation, every argument, every laughter-filled moment of your life.

So before you try to fix it—honor it.

Your foundational voice is your baseline.

It’s home.

And once you’ve accepted and honored it, then we can build on it.

 

Strengthening the Foundation

The goal isn’t to completely change your voice.

I don’t want you to sound like me—or like your favorite podcaster, or that one attorney you admire who commands the room with thunder.

I want you to understand your sound.

Where it’s strong.

Where it’s steady.

And where it sometimes cracks under pressure.

Because when you understand it, you can work with it.

Knowledge is power.

Once you know your strengths and your potential weak spots, you can start to grow—expanding your range, deepening your resonance, and strengthening your confidence.

That’s where real development begins.

 

The Real Obstacles Aren’t in Your Throat

Here’s the truth: most of the obstacles people face with their voice aren’t vocal at all.

They’re mental. Emotional. Internal.

When I ask people to describe their voice, I hear things like:

“It’s too deep.”

“It’s too nasally.”

“I sound like a hick.”

“I’m too soft-spoken.”

“I sound fake when I try something new.”

And I get it. I’ve heard these same sentences from high-level trial lawyers, singers, executives, teachers—everyone.

But here’s what’s actually happening:

These self-assessments turn into anchors.

They weigh you down.

They become mental scripts that keep you small, even when your body is ready to grow.

So when you start experimenting—breathing differently, speaking louder, pausing longer, adding emotion—your brain fights back.

It whispers:

“You sound fake.”

“You’re not being authentic.”

“People will think you’re performing.”

That’s not failure. That’s protection.

Your brain equates new with unsafe.

It wants the certainty of the familiar, even if the familiar isn’t serving you anymore.

So instead of judging that discomfort, interpret it correctly: it’s just a sign of growth.

 

The Authenticity Reframe

I recently attended a live coaching session with Jon Acuff, and he said something that hit me hard:

“Your work isn’t who you are.

Your work is a byproduct of knowing who you are.”

I loved that.

And I think we can expand it into the world of communication.

Because your voice isn’t who you are either.

Your voice is a byproduct of knowing who you are.

Your voice doesn’t create authenticity.

Authenticity creates a powerful voice.

Let me say that again:

Your voice doesn’t make you authentic—it reveals the authenticity that’s already there.

So when you start exploring new vocal possibilities—expanding your range, adding tone color, shifting rhythm—your brain might say,

“This feels fake.”

But it’s not fake.

You’re not borrowing someone else’s voice.

You’re creating new sound from inside your own body—your muscles, your cells, your breath.

That’s not performance.

That’s embodiment.

 

Redefining Authenticity

Authenticity isn’t about comfort.

It’s about alignment.

When your inner state and outer expression line up—when your tone, your breath, your body language, and your message all point in the same direction—that’s authenticity.

Your voice is simply the instrument that reveals that alignment to the world.

So if your voice shakes when you’re speaking truth—that’s authentic.

If it grows stronger as your confidence builds—that’s authentic.

If it expands into new colors and dynamics as you grow—that’s authentic, too.

Don’t confuse new with inauthentic.

You’re not changing who you are.

You’re uncovering more of who you are.

And when you can stand in that—when you can own the full spectrum of your voice, from soft compassion to firm authority—you become magnetic.

Because here’s the secret:

Jurors, clients, even your family—they don’t want perfect voices.

They want real ones.

Real voices make people lean in.

Real voices invite connection.

Real voices lead.

 

A Practice for the Week

So, as you move through your week, do two things:

1. Notice your voice.

   When you hear it on a recording or feel it vibrate in your chest, resist the urge to critique.

   Instead, just say: “That’s mine.”

2. Then, ask it to grow.

   Try one new thing—a little more volume, a slower pace, a new emotional tone—and notice what happens.

Your voice isn’t a mask you wear.

It’s the most personal, powerful, and revealing part of who you already are.

So stop trying to sound authentic—

and start letting your authentic self sound.

Until next time, honor your foundation… and keep fostering your voice.