In this episode, Kristi shares a lesson from behavior-change expert Dr. Karin Nordin about the surprising way social media can satisfy our desire for change without requiring us to actually change. Watching someone else cross the finish line, complete a workout, organize their home, or live the life we want can give us a tiny taste of the reward—while we're still lying in bed.

Kristi challenges you to pay attention to what your algorithm is feeding you and notice whether you're consuming content about the life you want instead of actually living it.

Then, in the Communication Tip, Kristi takes that behavior-change lesson into the courtroom with a powerful idea: meaningful change starts with inconsistency. If the brain relies on patterns to conserve energy, then predictable vocal and presentation patterns can cause jurors to disengage. Strategic pattern disruption through pitch, pace, melody, volume, and tone can reawaken attention and help jurors stay engaged with your case.

LISTEN HERE...

Favorite Moment

"You're both starving to change your behavior AND you've filled up with false accomplishments that prevent you from doing anything about it."

Links & Resources

Body Brain Alliance / Dr. Karin Nordin — https://bodybrainalliance.com/

Episode 84 — FYV #84 - The Vocal Patterns That Make Jurors Tune Out

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And this week, choose one pattern to disrupt. Change your pitch. Shift your pace. Vary your volume. Change your tone. Give your jury a reason to wake back up.

TRANSCRIPT:

Helllooooo!! Hello Foster Fam! Welcome to today's episode of the Foster Your Voice Podcast. I'm your host, Kristi Foster.

Throughout August, I did an unintentional series around goal setting and motivation. It sprung out of some personal development work that I've been doing as a member of a group called Change Academy — a membership program from Body Brain Alliance led by Dr. Karin Nordin. She has a PhD in Behavior Change, and I've just really enjoyed the neuroscience-backed lessons, exercises, and coaching for my personal growth.

That's maybe more than you NEED to know, but I mention it because I received an email from Karin — just like her regular weekly email that goes out to her general mailing list — that really got me thinking and examining some things so i wanted to share. And, since it was from her general email I don't feel like I'm giving away her proprietary material.

In the email, she told the story about how she found herself scrolling on Pinterest one night. She was kinda frustrated with her life at the current moment — not working out regularly, not eating as healthy as she'd like, not keeping up with housework, oversleeping, watching lots of TV...you get the picture. Just not living a well-intentioned life that she wanted. So, she was on Pinterest just mindlessly looking for "inspiration."

She tells about how she landed on a picture of a bathtub that was perfectly set for what would be a desireable Sunday night reset ritual, and she found herself just longing for that type of life, so she "pinned" the post, the equivalent of liking or saving a post on IG or FB if you're not familiar with Pinterest.

It was right at that moment that some things clicked into place for her. As a behavior change expert, she has a keen understanding of how the brain responds to cues, triggers, and rewards. You see, the brain OFTEN struggles to tell the difference between imagination and reality. It can't tell the difference between real physical threat and just being emotionally uneasy and anxious about change. And it can't distinguish between real results and the temporary satisfaction of viewing someone else's life.

She gave the example of "When you see that woman cross the finish line, you get a little boost of reward just as if you were the one to cross it... but you weren't. You're laying in bed. 

She goes on to say that, in her opinion, "one of the biggest reasons why everyone feels chronically unmotivated these days to do what they actually want to do is because we are all sabotaging our intrinsic sense of motivation by watching everyone else live the lives we want online."

Whew!!! How convicting is THAT?!

She says, "When you start to crave change in your life, that craving is SUPPOSED to build until you actually take action. The rise of social media + the ability to watch thousands of other people do that behavior at the touch of a button has created a situation where you can satisfy that craving WITHOUT real change."

Essentially, you're both starving to change your behavior AND you've filled up with false accomplishments that prevent you from doing anything about it. 

It was then that she put all the pieces together and realized, "hey! I've got a bathtub just down the hallway. i have a bath bomb. I have candles. I can actually live this for myself." And so she did.

So I'm going to challenge you the same way she challenged her email list...

Start paying attention to your algorithm, your newsfeed, and what is delivered to you through social media. How much time do you spend watching someone else do the behaviors you say YOU want. For me, I know that I watch a fair amount of health & fitness content — watching workouts or exercise explainers — other women getting strong, increasing their mobility, etc.

So start building your awareness of how those "other people's lives" reels light up the reward center of your brain, and how it triggers a sense of accomplishment. Then decide that you're no longer going to watch someone else live the life you dream for yourself. ACTUALLY live it.

If this resonated with you like it did me, let me know. I'd love to hear some of the ways you're identifying maybe some false rewards for yourself. And check out Body Brain Alliance if you're interested in more of Karin's teaching and training options.

—BREAK—

Like I said, this summer, I did a deep dive into behavior change, and one of the most powerful lesson I learned is that if you want meaningful change, it actually starts with INCONSISTENCY. This was really revolutionary, I thought, because you hear so much about discipline and consistency. You build new habits by consistently doing the new behavior. That's the messaging I'm hearing at least.

So, to hear that it's INconsistency that actually starts things, was a moment of awakening for me. I mean, think about it...You've gotten where you are because of Consistency. Repetition, habits. So, if you want to grow and develop, you need to CHANGE something to spark the beginning of a new neural pathway. It's pattern DISRUPTION that is the power play here.

It's true for your personal goal journey, AND it's true for your communication technique too. Vocal & presentational consistency will be the death of you...or, really...it'll be the death of your jury. THEY need you to be INconsistent.

You've heard me talk about the danger of patterns before, and I'm talking about it again because it's CRITICAL that you learn to embrace this idea of inconsistency and pattern disruption. It's when you inject some novelty into your communication that you reawaken attention.

Our brains are hard wired to look for pattern recognition. Why? Because it's actively looking for ways to conserve energy. One of it's primary functions is to keep you alive so it's trying to spend the fewest amount of calories as possible. It does this through pattern recognition and prediction, both of which help the brain process more effectively and in turn, relax and conserve. For your jurors though, you WANT them staying attentive. You don't want to lull them, cognitively, and risk losing their engagement. Your consistency will lead to their disinterest.

You HAVE to disrupt. Disrupt your pacing. Disrupt your tone. Change up your physical position. Choose a moment or a phrase to pop up to a different registration quick. Just briefly shift the status quo. Reset attention so cognitive fatigue doesn't set it.

Now, I'm not suggesting that you get cartoonish. We don't need you doing Goofy impressions in the court. You can do what I'm suggesting without stepping away from professionalism. When you intentionally create novelty in your vocal presentation, you refresh engagement, reset emotional energy, without distracting anyone from the substance of your case. Without those strategic novelty moments though, you effectively mute yourself and your substance is lost.

Here are some things you can try this week:

Disrupt PITCH patterns by popping up to a higher pitch to start a new thought, or a new section. This will create an energy shift and creates a demarkation that says, "hey listen up! something new here."

Disrupt your PACE by finding moments to strategically speed up and slow down. Look for times where you're going to have a list of things, and use that opportunity to speed up and then slow yourself down. Practice this. They did this and this and this/and then here was the result. She experienced this symptom, this difficulty, this challenge/but she still tried to do this behavior. Can you hear the inconsistent pace? I'm making up the words, of course, but i'm disrupting the energy and helping you hear distinct points.

Disrupt your MELODY by using both ascending and descending melodic phrases. I talk specifically about melodic ruts that you can easily get stuck in in Ep. 84, so be sure to go give that a listen.

Disrupt VOLUME by finding moments where you can go quickly loud and back down. Sound effects are great for this. A car should never crash, it should CRASH. Give your jurors a visceral moment they can feel, that sticks with them in a sensory way.

Disrupt your vocal patterns by changing your TONE. This is a no brainer. You have to capture the different emotional layers and the intended meaning of your message with TONE. Speak brighter with my drive when you want to really bring a point home. Make your voice warmer and darker when you need them to hear the compassion in your voice and when they need to feel the gravity of the situation.

These are just a few ways you can embrace the power of INconsistency. Which will you try this week?

Let me know by emailing me at [email protected] or sending me a DM on IG or LInkedIn. And until next time...keep fostering your voice.